A vintage rock fountain in the distance a heavy downpour and beautiful garnet roses
| |

How to trust God when everything says it’s impossible

What happens when what God has to say challenges everything we see? Is it possible to trust and believe Him over what we can physically see?

A little boy and his little baby sister she is wearing an adorable salmon color onesie

“Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God.”

I had been walking closely with God for several years, I loved reading my Bible. I loved hearing the stories of Jesus. Of Gods healing power, so I prayed, Lord, show me your glory. Abba, I want to see you move in power and in glory! 

At the end of 2014 I gathered together with a few close sisters in Christ to pray. One precious friend began to share how God was showing her she was not trusting God with how many children He had in store for her. The more I listened the more I felt weird inside. I know she’s talking about herself, I thought, but why does it feel like The Lord is speaking to me too? 

A vase with garnet roses in water on a beautiful dinning room table set with lace

We finished praying. As everyone was leaving, I went and found one of the older women in our group, I would share with her what I felt The Lord was showing me. She told me to go home and pray, to obey The Word of the Lord. So I did. I came home and told my husband what had happened. At this point we had two children and I was on birth control. We prayed together and apart. I felt The Lord clearly say to my spirit, “I have another daughter for you, but she will not come until you get off of birth control, I know the children I will give you, You trust me in every area, except for this one.” I was convicted to my core and wanted desperately to be in obedience. In faith I waited for The Lord to show my husband the same, He did. We began the process to get off birth control. I assumed we would conceive pretty quickly, but what happened next left me heartbroken, perplexed but all the more seeking The heart of God. Finding refuge in the pages of His Word.

Little girl looking Angelic in a white dress surrounded by tall grass and roses in the background

When life doesn’t quite look like what you imagined

My husbands heart grew hardened towards me. As I pursued the heart of God with reckless abandon, he felt a great divide. I was different, made new from the inside out in a way I had only dreamed. Oneness with God. I couldn’t believe that the very words I had prayed, “Lord change me, transform me into the image of your son” would be spoken of me but in a negative light. 

I felt rejected. And still I pursued God, holding onto this promise, God is for my family. Looking back I can see how harmful it was to our relationship, me hiding away in the room to pray, to read my Bible instead of spending time with my husband who was only home for a day or two out of the week, but I didn’t understand this then, it would take sometime for me to be able to acknowledge the pain I had caused.

We were both hurting and lacked the skills to communicate our pain. I can also see the beauty amidst all the hurt. The time we invest in our relationship with God will never be taken from us, no matter how many mistakes we make to encounter Fathers heart. He is honored in our sacrifice.

A beautiful family, mama is pregnant. Daddy is the protector caring for his three children.

Almost a year had passed since God had given us this promise of a new baby girl. And I didn’t know at the end of this grueling year if God would see us through?

I was so desperate to get it right, to choose God. I knew He was for my family, so I prayed, “Heal us Lord, restore us Father for your Names sake, for your glory alone and for our good…”

There was a lot of crying in this season, but I held on to this promise, “I have another daughter for you.”

How Lord? I let my tears fall because I knew God would catch them, store them in bottles in heaven. Psalms 56:8 I knew this season wouldn’t be wasted, but I didn’t know how. How could He possibly use all of this pain for our good?

When it seems impossible, His redemption is near, He will hear the depths of our pain and sorrow.

A vintage rock fountain in the distance a heavy downpour and beautiful garnet roses

One evening as I cried out to God from the depths of my despair. He moved suddenly on my behalf. All of the offense of the year came to a halt, in brokenness my husband asked for my forgiveness for his part in the divide and Father God restored us. That nightmare of a year had ended and a few months later we would conceive our second baby girl. Our third child.

Our Vow Renewal

That summer we made preparations for our vow renewal. We had been married ten years now and we wanted to celebrate Gods faithfulness, His goodness. His provision and kindness towards us. With the help of our dear family friend, Wanita, the Renewal was coming together beautifully. We were so excited to have our gender reveal at the celebration! It was going to be an amazing time! God had done it! He had carried us through! We waited until the last possible moment to have our anatomy scan, we were 20 weeks pregnant. We knew this Drs. visit as the gender reveal, nothing could have prepared us for the news we were about to receive and the incredibly journey of faith we would embark on. Ventriculomegaly. Hydrocephalus. A severe case. We walked out of the office stunned and heartbroken. What did all of this mean? Why? How? What had I done wrong?

As I sat in my van sobbing. I very clearly heard The Lord in my spirit, not audibly, but firmly say, “you are not to look this up!” And so I didn’t. My husband sat in his vehicle and looked up every single possible thing he could find out about this diagnosis and the prognosis as most parents would have. He was heartbroken. We came home. Sorrowfully, he shared a little of what he had read, it wasn’t good. We held each other, we knew they would ask us to end our babies life. The news was more than our hearts could bear. I asked him to please pray. I didn’t know what he would pray, but I silently hoped He would ask of The Lord for healing, when I heard him say, “O Lord, please heal our baby girl.” Sobs overtook our bodies as we held one another and waited. What would God do?

Who are we that we can ask of The Lord? That He is mindful of us? Psalms 8:4

He is our Abba Father. We don’t hold the answers, and we are weak and powerless, but He is life itself. We are His children. Empty hands and dirty faces before our Father. And yet He loves us so much that He gave His One and only Son for us, what kind of love is this? This is true love. He calls us His own. We are His. Secured in Him.

a little girl covered in mud from head to toe

I am astounded once again as I look at the life of Jesus, abiding with His Father, and I long for us to do this too, to rest in His promises and in His love, not for the healing He can bring, not for the provisions he freely gives, but because He is our Abba Father who desires to be with us, because He gave His Son Jesus for us. To woo us in. To draw us into the eternal promise back to Himself.

I walked into what would be the little girls room, and I wailed before God. “How could you do this to me Lord? Father, you said you had more children for me. I don’t understand this kind of cruelty Lord. Only to take her from me?”

I am but a child before her Father. He deals mercifully with us even in our heartbreak and confusion, doubting and fear. How we could enter into His Presence and not be struck down. He is God. The Creator of the entire Universe and all the fullness thereof are His.

a basket full of light and dark pink roses

In my sorrow I almost didn’t hear Him say, “she will not die! She will live and she will declare the works of The Lord!”. I couldn’t believe my ears. What did this mean? How? Had He not been in the room with us? Read the reports? Seen the scans?

Maybe I understood just a little bit of how Abraham felt, his promised son Isaac, placed on the alter, ready to be sacrificed before The Lord. Abraham would earlier tell Isaac The Lord would provide the sacrifice, when Isaac asked where the sacrifice was. 

I inclined my ear unto The Lord as He said, “this will be harder than anything you have ever walked through, but I will be with you, I need you to fight for her life, choose life for her!!!”.

Yessi Argabright, gather your sisters
a darling little girl in a floral dress covering her face with her tiny chubby hands

I had asked to see Gods mighty works on display. I didn’t mean, for me to have to need God to come through in this way! I didn’t understand what I was asking, but He knew, and just like Jesus when He spoke to Mary and Martha at Lazarus tomb, I heard His words clearly, “did I not tell you if you believe you will see the glory of God?”.

It is Gods goodness we would celebrate

How could we celebrate now? Just a week before our vow renewal, we wanted to crawl under a rock and die. And figuratively speaking, “I did hide under The Rock and I did die”, I died to every belief I had once held about how God works, how God speaks. How He heals. How God would display His power. He is God, I am not. 

The LORD Himself was inviting us into one of the greatest miracles of our lives! Would we believe Him? Would I hold on tightly to The One who was holding me? I look back at this time so fondly, everything said, “you did not hear God correctly.” Every image. Every scan. All of it pointing to, “she will not live”. But I had this promise from God, “she will not die! She will live and declare the works of God!” Would I believe God? Or Man?

It is the invitation He is calling all of us into. To see the glory of God. His goodness. In our everyday ordinary lives. In the washing of the laundry, the sweeping of the floors. The looking into children’s eyes and recalling for them His faithful deeds of old. Deut. 6 Do not discount the mundane. The moments of sheer exhaustion. Of God meeting you here. He is calling us closer than our very breath, do not fear, but when you do, like Peter, call out to Him, O, Lord, Save me!” and He will.

A portrait of an open door beautiful shades of greens and blues

In life we are faced with this decision every single day. Will we believe the circumstances we are walking through, screaming there is no God! He has forsaken you! Forgotten you! He doesn’t care. If God was really good, why would He allow such suffering… He must not care, and on and on the lies go. 

In this season I learned to cry out all the more to The One who makes us strong. I remember telling Him, I needed Him to be more REAL than the skin on my bones, more real then the blood flowing through my veins, more real than the dirt beneath my feet and more real then the air in my lungs! What I was facing at every appointment was a death sentence. I would hear it in my mind, it would stop me in my tracks, “You carry death” I would exclaim loudly, “I do not carry death, I carry life!”

Although we were broken hearted over the news of our darling baby girl, we felt strongly through prayer, God wanted us to celebrate HIS GOODNESS!!! He wanted us to be surrounded by people who loved us and would pray for us. People who would help to carry us through during this season of great unknown. 

I want you to know there will be promises Father gives you. These promises you may have to war for, in prayer. Hold steadfast and only believe. He who has spoken is Faithful. When everything else passes, His Word will stand the test of time.

Yessi Argabright
A beautiful girl barefoot stepping out of a puddle of water as it ripples behind her

We had to believe Gods Word over the words of the Drs. These men and women, educated with their degrees and understanding beyond our own. They too are humans, like us, they do not see the beginning from the end.

I have a simple faith. The Lord said it, therefore I believe it. I want this for you. In the face of the giants that rise up to mock us, to tear us down, God has not forgotten you, sister! 

He held me close and He never let go! And because I didn’t abort my baby girl I got to see Father move in power at her birth, astounding all of our Drs and medical team. 

I simply choose to be a vessel in the hands of my Father, to display His glory, in my very broken and messy life. I don’t hold all the answers, but I love The One who does, and He loves me. We are His beloved. He will not leave us.

If you are walking through a fiery trial, I want you to know you have not been forgotten. The Lord is closer than your very breath and it is my prayer you will feel His nearness and love even as you wrestle with the unknowns. That your heart and mind would be so at peace as mine was many times during that season. So at peace that I said absolutely ridiculous things like, “I am okay with the unknown.” In response to our precious Dr. telling me through teary eyes she was so sorry they didn’t have any real answers, only wait and see if the neurosurgeons words would prove true. Here you can read more about the beauty we encountered because we trusted. May you find it life giving as you navigate your own journey with King Jesus. 

a lovely young woman wearing a large brim hat with one hand on the brim. a gentle smile

Thank you so much for being here. Praying for our hope and faith to stay rooted in The One who loves us most. There is so much more I want to say to you, but for today, keep your eyes on King Jesus, I leave you with Paul’s prayer to the Ephesians, and for you and me too:

“For this reason, because I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love toward all the saints, I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come. And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭1‬:‭15‬-‭23‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Amen. What a beautiful prayer. 

A Yesenia pathos in a lovely wicker basket

Dig deeper: Genesis 22, Psalms 84, 118, 118:7, Proverbs 18:21, John 11:40, Colossians 3:2

Thank you for being here. If this message has blessed you, would you bless my heart and leave me a comment letting me know? Please share with your people whom you know need this message of hope. Thankful for you. Would you please consider subscribing in the next slide?

Similar Posts

3 Comments

  1. Yessi, your obedience to the Lord is encouraging and your love for Him is infectious – Keep going Sis! Keep sharing!! I loved it all, thank you ❤️

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *